Focus Is a Form of Self-Love: How to Calm the Chaos and Actually Get Things Done
Struggling to concentrate? I discovered a mindset shift to help you reclaim your focus, confidence, and peace (and you can start today)
Is focusing difficult for you? What about staying focused?
Maybe it’s ADHD, or maybe not.
It doesn’t matter what “causes” distraction if you’re struggling with it.
It’s so frustrating and can really take its toll on our self confidence and self worth.
If you feel like there are 10 gazillion things to do and to think about and you can’t land on one single thing long enough to get it done, then try this one mindset shift that I just discovered to help you focus. It's a gamechanger.
Think of focus as a form of self-love.
Self-love is when you treat yourself with the same grace and kindness that you would offer a loved one or a dear friend.
My advice is that you treat your focus as self-love.
How in the world is this possible? It starts with simple affirmations.
Here are a couple examples of affirmations with self-love as the motivator for focus: I care about myself and I understand focus is very hard for me. I am going to honor myself by protecting my focus. I will create and protect an environment for myself that supports and encourages my focus.
You probably know (or have a good idea) of what you need to focus. Some people need total quiet, some need their music. Some people need a checklist. Some people need a timer. Some people need accountability from a friend.
If you’re thinking, "Suzanne! I don’t KNOW what I need to focus!" then, I encourage you think about what DOESN’T help you.
Maybe you know you cannot focus when it’s 3am. Then, try at 1pm after you’ve rested.
Maybe you know you cannot focus when you’re hungry. Then, make sure you’ve eaten.
Knowing what doesn’t work counts as powerful evidence and is an excellent place to start.
Instead of complaining and feeling like a distracted failure, fiercely protect your focus like you protect your phone (lol, but for real).
Basically, we complain about not being able to focus, but what are we actually DOING to focus?
Complaining doesn’t get us anywhere.
Make it your mission to love yourself and take care of yourself by fiercely protecting your focus.
Here’s an example so you can better understand using focus as self-care: You’re in your bedroom, and there are so many bags to unpack from college (or a trip or camp) and you KNOW you need to unpack.
But, it’s SO MUCH STUFF.
You are tripping over the bags and containers and getting aggravated several times a day.
You feel anxious because it’s such a mess. You are mad at yourself for not doing anything about it.
Here’s the mindset shift: instead of freaking out and panicking, or giving up and saying eff it, you tell yourself, “I need to focus on unpacking and I am protecting my focus because I love myself and she needs support with focus to get this accomplished.”
You decide that you will protect yourself and your focus, so you set a timer for 15 minutes, choose one bag to unpack, and turn up your favorite music (or whatever noise canceling you need) to protect your focus. You get to work because you are locked in.
After the 15 minutes are up, one bag will be unpacked, you will feel the awesome natural dopamine rush of accomplishment from the self-love and task completion.
I encourage you to try this one mindset shift–it’s really a game changer.
After all, a simple mindset shift can move mountains. Each baby step forward is a step in the right direction.
You've got this, sweet girl. Protect your focus because that's self-love!
You’re stronger than you think you are, and I’ve always got your back.
🩵, Suzanne
Suzanne Hanna, Ed.S. | Life Coach for College & Teen Girls
@suzannehannacoaching
